Anxiety, Surrender, and the Magical Beauty of Things Happening at the Right Time

The first weeks of life are truly magical.

My daughter was born just a few weeks ago, and it’s amazing how much personality is already evident in a baby that would seem to do little more than sleep, eat, and poop.

But no, the personality is definitely there, and every day I learn something new about her.

That, more than anything else, is why I’m so grateful to step back from my work for the next few months, to be completely present with my daughter, and my wife.

And thank goodness, because I see so vividly how quickly each moment is gone!

It feels idyllic, but I can’t help but reflect on how differently things could have gone – because on so many levels, this time has been years and years in the making.

Beginning with the pregnancy itself…

Trials, Attempts, and Fertility Clinics

When my wife and I first met, it was magic.

We first connected through a dating website, and met at an Ethiopian restaurant for our first date. Three hours flew by in the blink of an eye, and less than six months later, we were engaged.

It felt like a fairy tale, so we just expected the fairy tale to continue when we decided to start trying to have kids.

But it didn’t.

One month passed, then another, and then another.

Each month, despite our best attempts at timing the key moments, the strip refused to turn blue.

As the months passed, our confidence began to waver.

We started researching, and learning about all the things that could make it difficult for a couple to conceive.

Eventually, we made our way to fertility clinics, and began treatments. There were several unsuccessful attempts, and each time, our anxiety grew.

Was this just not meant to happen for us?

It’s amazing how much an experience like this messes with your head. On some level, I even began to wonder if maybe I’d used up all the good fortune I’d been allotted in life. Maybe I’d experienced a measure of success, peaked at 30, and it was all going to be down-hill from here?

Almost two discouraging years after we’d begun trying to conceive, we were still childless.

But then, it happened…

“Congratulations – you’re pregnant!”

I remember the moment that we got the phone call.

It was a warm day in August, and client was in town for the week to work with me at the Mirasee offices.

My wife got the call, and stepped into my office to take it in privacy.

I excused myself and followed her, but it was a short call, and she had hung up before I joined her. I found her in tears, and my heart caught in my throat.

But then she looked at me, smiled, and nodded.

It had happened, finally. We were pregnant.

We enjoyed a quiet moment of celebration together, before I returned to the conference room, as though nothing had happened.

Celebration turns to Panic

After so long trying to conceive, we felt a little bit jinxed, and were walking on egg shells for the next few weeks, hardly believing that it was really true.

But then, as it began to feel more real (thank you, morning sickness!), we began to process it all, and realized that a lot of things would have to change.

Because, as well as we felt we were doing, our lifestyles just didn’t seem to have room for the addition of a child.

For one, I was on the road far too much of the time; almost twice each month throughout 2014.

And in addition to that, both my wife and I were working 60-80 hour weeks to lead and grow our organization.

I realized with a sinking feeling that, the way things were looking, I’d be faced with…

An Impossible Choice

Now, I love my work, my team, our students, and the impact that we’re all committed to making in the world.

But at the same time, it all required (much like a child, ironically) a lot of my care and attention to survive, grow, and thrive.

So I could keep growing my company (with difficulty, since my better half was going to give birth and go on maternity leave), at the expense of being present for my daughter’s childhood…

…or I could focus on my daughter, and risk everything I’d worked to build; the success of my students, the livelihoods of my team, and the impact that we were all working to create in the world that my daughter will eventually live in.

What would I do? In my shoes, what would you do?

Salvation and Growth in Preparation and Timing

Fast forwarding to today, and clearly, it’s all worked out.

I’ve scaled back my hours dramatically, to only a few hours of work each day.

I’m present with my wife and daughter, to fully share and experience these first months of her life.

And at the same time, Mirasee continues to grow; last month we generated over $150,000 in revenue, and every day new systems, processes, and initiatives are coming online to help us grow better and faster into the future.

Now, I’d love to say that all this was made possible by six months of clever maneuvering on my part, but that would be a bald-faced lie.

Because while I did do a lot to let my business function without me in the last six months, the truth is that a lot of this was made possible by groundwork that I’ve been carefully laying since the early days, when it was just me and Megan at Firepole Marketing in 2011.

Those choices are what put me on the path to the company that I’m running today: 20 people generating multiple millions in annual revenue, and growing fast…

…even while I step back for months at a time to be with my newborn daughter.

And believe me, it didn’t have to be this way; there are way too many people out there who skyrocket to success, but plateau at the mid-six-figures because they’re holding their business together with both hands, and rolls of duct tape.

My Learned Appreciation of Setbacks and Timing

All of this brings me to appreciate the years that we spent fruitlessly trying to conceive.

Yes, it was difficult. I’m an impatient person, and hate waiting by nature.

But really, if circumstances hadn’t forced me to wait, I can’t imagine how difficult our lives would be right now, or how much I’d be missing out on.

So I’m grateful… and while my daughter sleeps, I begin to wonder…

What strikes me most about my path to where I am today is that, as intentional as it was, it was also incredibly winding, filled with false starts, and wrong turns.

The road has been challenging, especially because hardly anybody out there teaches what it really takes to go from a business that will inevitably cap out at six figures, and one that will grow and scale to seven figures and beyond.

Now, there are good reasons why this stuff isn’t taught; it’s complicated, nuanced, and only relevant to people who are on a growth trajectory that many don’t even aspire to.

And spending these last weeks with my daughter, I’m so grateful for the way that it all worked out, and feel a responsibility to share it with others who want to do the same.

So now, I’m faced with a dilemma, and I need your help.

Time with My Daughter vs. the Example I Want to Set for Her

Part of me just wants to forget all about this, and go play with my daughter, who’s beginning to stir.

And that’s what I’ll do. I’ll play with her, feed her, change her diaper, and maybe read her one of the high contrast black and white books that she loves so much, before putting her down to sleep.

But when she sleeps, I’ll come back to wondering: what sort of person has knowledge that can help others, but doesn’t share it?

Is that really the example that I want to set for my daughter?

Of course it isn’t, and so if enough people want me to, I’ll take the time when my daughter is napping to organize the lessons that I learned growing my business from 6 to 7 figures, so that I can share it with you.

But I won’t do it unless you really want me to, so I need your help.

Help Me Decide: Should I Share This With You?

I’ve learned to guard my time preciously, though, so I’ll only do this if you’re absolutely, genuinely interested to learn it.

So right now, I need you to help me decide.

Do you want me to share the lessons that I learned growing my business from 6 to 7 figures?

If you do, leave a comment below.

Tell me that you want me to do this.

Tell me what your ambitions are, and what you’d like these lesson to help you achieve.

Tell me that I won’t waste time away from my daughter by doing this.

If I hear from enough people below, then I’ll do it. Her nap time will be my work time, and I’ll commit to preparing a special training for you, sharing the lessons that I learned taking my business from 6 to 7 figures, and creating the freedom to play with my daughter.

Now, I hear her cry, so I’m going to pick her up and feed her.

I look forward to hearing from you below!